Me. At least after what I've been through.
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
Dude I pulled down his pants and he already had a condom on
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
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