I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
She's clinging to me like a horny koala.
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
I had nothing but condoms at the checkout, then grabbed a pack of Orbitz gum and said "gotta protect from bad breath" felt like a boss
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
