And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
My roommate was eating ketchup out of a bowl. Get me the hell out of here.
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
She got stuck in the front door. She never told me how or why.
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
We had sex in his hot tub. Then we saved a mouse that almost drown in his pool. We celebrated our heroism with more sex.
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
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