I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
So I was having a really bad night...so I decided to steal a pumpkin.
Randomize
