I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
period poops. best. ever.
omigod im sitting here with ben and he and i both got that...chick you totally just mass texted that...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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