I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
Sorry. Not doing life today. Love to. But can't.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
Randomize
