I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
This guy just came in and told me how he bought a clock for his cat so his cat can know when he's coming home...
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
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