i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
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