Is it because I queefed?
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
Hey just wanted to let you know my nose is broken and I have a fractured wrist. I told you it wasn't a slip and slide.
Dude I didn't think you'd do it. I mean come on, who puts a slip and slide on their driveway?
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
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