If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
How's dating the med student working out for you?
After we had sex last night he showed me where my spleen was.
A true anatomy project.
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
I opened my bookbag to put my laptop in and I found two granola bars and a pregnancy test. I am clearly prepared for life
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
Randomize
