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• (805): View more from California

  all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.

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• (406): View more from Montana

  Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.

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• (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  apparently the officer said last night, "son, why don't you do yourself a favor and spread your legs so you don't keep vomiting on them". why can't I remember those nights?!

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• (202): View more from Washington, DC

  im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please

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  23 Men Confess The Moment They Realized They Wanted A Divorce

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• (248): View more from Michigan

  Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.

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• (415): View more from California

  You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.

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• (608): View more from Wisconsin

  I am too young to be this hungover

  (262): View more from Wisconsin

  Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?

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• (214): View more from Texas

  I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.

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• (845): View more from New York

  Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.

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  The 23 Most Inappropriate Things To Happen At A Funeral

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• (780): View more from Alberta, CA

  It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk

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• (520): View more from Arizona

  That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.

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• (336): View more from North Carolina

  You attract beautiful men with jobs. I attract ONE WITH A SOUL PATCH.

  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  it was a sexy soul patch.

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• (705): View more from Ontario

  I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were

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• (732): View more from New Jersey

  I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.

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• (757): View more from Virginia

  Eat, nap, & pace yourself. Words to live by.

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