Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
I'm just learned what a rim job is, I feel like crying
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Randomize
