We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
Randomize