I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
They should make Glad Forceflex condoms.
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
Randomize
