Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
Sacagawea was the original milf.
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im in a bar and I just invented a scrabble drinking game. People are cheering. It's like the universe has aligned itself.
His roommate just snorted a line of Smirnoff off the desk. I could really fit in here.
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
I told him to come over when I realized that I did have time for a quick booty call before church.
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
Randomize