what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
After she came with my hands around her neck, she sat there for a minute and gave me the scuba diving sign for a-ok.
I rode on his Vespa around Florence and fucked him in an empty train. It was like a way sluttier version of Lizzy McGuire
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
We smoked a bowl in front of the abortion clinic shouting Obama at the protestors.
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
How do you initiate sexting are u supposed to be like yo I'm peeing and eating a clif bar and texting and thinking about you naked all at the same time
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
I hummed the theme from jaws while she was taking the pregnancy test....needless to say she was not pleased
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
