i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
You should not be allowed to go away on the weekends I plan on getting drunk on. I need someone to stop me from punching this guy in the face. It's simple room mate etiquette.
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
Randomize
