You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
When i walked in, you were in bed with a hot chick rolled up in a green blanket and said you were acting like a caterpillar..
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
There's some band that practices next door to my apartment. I'm thinking we may need to check that out. I could be like, "Hey boys, thought you might like some lemonade and vagina."
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
Randomize
