plz talk dirty to me
Fine. I'll sleep in my office
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
it's like that moment that you're driving and realize you're lost except instead of driving i'm just sitting here in my living room drunk, eating a plate of sausages, drinking red wine and just thinking "i'm going to be 28 this year. i know people who are married, with beautiful and well behaved children. where was the wrong turn?"
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
THERE IS JIZZ ON MY CEILING. HOW THE FUCK IS THERE JIZZ ON MY CEILING
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