I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
His parents then knew me as the blackout who took care of him and stole his watch