then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
