I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
I may have a concussion but the symptoms are the same as a hangover so I can't tell. Best 21st ever.
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
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