I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
Just saw pictures of a pregnant teen from my hometown with an American flag wrapped around her naked body posted on FB without irony. These are my roots.
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
At 3:00am my whole house started smelling like cooking meat. I have no idea why she thought it was a good idea to crock-pot a WHOLE turkey that early in the morning.
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
I couldnt face her after that wonderful, terrible blowjob. Made a rope out of towels and climbed out her bathroom window.
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
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