Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
I'm too hungover for some lady to talk to me about potatoes
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
Please don't ever try giving my cat a hair cut ever ever again
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
We got back from the bar and started watching bizzare foods, which subsequently led to the consumption of large amounts of rancid lunch meat and small insects.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
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