Just wanted to let you know that I always win at "whose ex is crazier" because of you.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
Come over, I want to eat cookie dough off your dick.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
I just forgot I was standing up.
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
Randomize
