I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
His internet searches, listed chronologically: sex slave, volunteer sex slave, lava
pray for me tomorrow cause I have a midterm that I've mostly studied for by watching Bill Nye episodes on the subject...
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
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