omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
It's happening again. I feel like I'm under water and my heart beat matches "Teenage Wasteland"
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
Randomize
