I like to think it a success when the cops are called
Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
he thought it would be funny to put his dick inside a beer bottle and wear it around. until we all realized how small his dick would have to be to fit in a beer bottle
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
Randomize