He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
As it turns out, strippers don't accept checks.
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
Got my period and a UTI on the same day. Fuck you, Sunday.
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