I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Nicee. Atleast your phone doesn't change pen in to PENISsSSSSSSS like mine does
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
Randomize