I heard we made out
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
I got titty fucked last night and you're breastfeeding your newborn. Clearly we have gone two totally different paths since 2011.
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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