last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Mom found my vibrator. all the said was 'wow, I've never seen one like this before.'
we don't live in the stone age anymore, mom
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
This message brought to you by inappropriate slogans. Cotton candy, melting in your mouth like boners.
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
Please tell me I didn't send you a dick pic in the middle of Peter Pan..
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