Already got asked if we're dating
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
I have fruit by the foot roll-ups. I wonder if a man could tie them together and make an editable bra....
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
he just fucked me for my cheese..
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
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