help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
Ps he swallowed my earring last night so yeah
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
Randomize
