Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
This dress was meant to end up on your floor
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
What's the kids name that was drinking stale beer and redbull out of the blender?
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
I asked you if you wanted to go to the ER, have me sew it up or just wrap it in duct tape and keep on keepin on. You just said YES. I remember very little after that.
You're a good friend.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
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