Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
I saw a picture of a baby and it reminded me to take my birth control. Priorities
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
I think I'm taking after my dog, I just want to hump everything
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
