I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
But forealz I'm gonna need a solid 52 orgasms so hydrate.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize
