Passed out watching pirates of caribbean with vodka in hand. Woke up to jenna jameson, with vodka gone.
yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
If I die tonight, wear a V neck to my funeral.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
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