these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
Do I have a sign around my neck that says "SWM desperately seeking ultra-plus-size woman that likes everything I do"? I swear they're organized
No, but you do have a sign around your neck that says "Free cupcakes."
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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