I didn't have a rubber, but my dick had a date with a clorox wipe after we finished. I think I'm in the clear.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
we can't get the sharpie off the toilet seat from where you pressed your forearm with THUG LIFE written on it while you puked until 3 last night
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
What kind of true American would I be if I didn't just smoke weed in my bathrobe on my back porch in the middle of suburbia on 4/20? #stepmomoftheyear
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
Did you at least know who's jizz it was?
That is questionable.
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
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