Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
Took out half a tooth with a handle of jim beam last night. Apparently I can't walk and chug bourbon at the same time
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
I think Facebook knows you fucked me. All of a sudden I get everything you do in my news feed.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
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