Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
I feel like every time I get the courage to masturbate to a guy from Game of Thrones, they kill him off.
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
beggars cant be choosers....im desperate and he has a dick. he checks all the boxes.
Randomize
