Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
When you're not at your house I assumed you're somewhere having sex
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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