if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
I just gave myself a foot massage. #SingleAsFuck
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
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