Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
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What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
I pulled some girls weeve trying to pull the stop cord on the bus
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
How did I get home last night?
We put your keys on a lanyard that asked anyone that found you to bring you home. A nice man in a cape, green shorts and a mesh shirt dropped you off this morning.
Oh. Yeah. Riiiggghhht
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Don’t eat the Doritos. Jeff was eating them while he was watching porn
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