A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
What's more sad than going to Target to buy Plan B and the new Sam Smith album?
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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