you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
Amazing. Super drunk. We stole a street sign in a golf cart and went around jousting trash cans all night.
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
You were doing bacon vodka shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce. You're officially fucking disgusting. I love you.
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
I woke up and my pants were in the kitchen but my shoes were next to my bed. Do the math...
Nothing like being naked and confused and clutching a scented candle...at least I woke up in my own bed though.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
Randomize
