Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
Is it sad that when she told me he has a small peen I felt like it made us more compatible?
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
Houston, we have a squirter
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
Does sweetest day count when you're spending it with your fuck buddy, high and eating Pizza Hut?
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
Randomize
