Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
Also...I'm semi-dating the drug dealer that took me to bible study
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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