I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
He waited until after foreplay to tell me that he didn't have a condom and "we" would just have to settle for a bj tonight...
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
I'm on someone's yacht. I don't know who. But I'm on it. There's a guy passed out in a kilt holding bagpipes. Help.
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