Joe is yelling at the trees again.
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
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We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
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He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him