Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
Guys who wear capris make me want to kill endangered species.
This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
Why is there a living, breathing cow on your front porch?
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
I blame it on the rum. It keeps jumpng doqn my throst.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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