how hairy? two words: wookie tits
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
As girls, Bert & Ernie are not very bangable costumes. At least not by who we'd want to get banged by.
I was kidding. But I promise you I'd still find us the most eligible bangables, even if we dressed up like a dumpster and a prom night baby.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
Dude. My tinder just blew up in Seattle. I'm moving here. I don't give a fuck
You kept hiding under tables and grabbing people's legs and shouting SHARK ATTACK.
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Randomize