haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
only you would photoshop your dick
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
His bootycalls folder in his contacts are divided into regions, we should have all become airline pilots.
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
I'm always down for nudity.
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
Randomize
